Often times, i make an effort to write -something-delicious about him. I always start on a paper but stop half-way and tear it all-up. For what words can describe him? A man i have not seen and heard?
Sometimes when the guilt is too much, it pushes me to pick my old laptop and write something down like i am doing now.
But even then, the words fail me, for i fear, no words , no story or essay can do justice to him!
Even if i am able to write my thoughts down , it still can’t describe;
how deep my heart has grown,
how much peace my soul has found,
how miraculously my paranoid- sickness vanished,
how strong i have become,
how content i am,
Because indeed , there were days i was dead….that i thought only of killing myself, of not finding myself worthy to fit into this so called world.
and then he appeared! to lit up my world! ooh what a joy he brought to my heart, that people who kept a bet on me dryly asked, ‘what the hell happened to her?’
i now can laugh out loud,
i now can smile deeply,
i now can inhale the morning’s freshly air ,
i now can truly live,
i now can break boundaries and make histories,
ooh why the frown? why is your head down? so you actually believed i would rot? face-out?
then there’s news for you….
ooh yes! You ask what the hell happened to her??…